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To all the dad’s out there — happy Father’s Day. I didn’t have a father growing up, he was gone by the time I was nine. Some months after his departure, my mother fell ill to cancer, and battled that insidious disease for the majority of my formative years. Growing up in that environment certainly had its moments of weighted obfuscation and introspection.

I didn’t learn to drive until I was in my twenties, serving in the army at the time. I Didn’t know the difference between a Phillips and a Flat head, no concept of how to change a tire, fix a broken something, or any of the other nuances that come with “manhood,” and fatherhood.

I wouldn’t learn those crafts until I was as I said, in my twenties, serving in the big green machine of Canada’s military. It was there however, that other men, men who were father’s as well, began showing me without meaning to what it meant to be a father; they demonstrated kindness, compassion and patience, sincerity, and guidance. I watched them interact with their children and I remember being stricken with a sense of “ah-ha!” This is what a father should REALLY look like.

They didn’t hit their kids when they couldn’t pronounce a word correctly, or shame them after spilling a glass of milk, they took time to teach their children, share their knowledge and working concept of the world with them. It was a sight to behold for me.

It’s something I’ve held and carried with me for years now; these images and teachings of father’s, REAL father’s. So, today is YOUR day, and I wish you the very best of it.

Happy Father’s Day.

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I’m Matthew

Welcome to the Unfiltered Mind of Matthew Heneghan.

I’m a former Canadian Armed Forces medic (1 Field Ambulance) and civilian paramedic who traded the siren for the pen. After fifteen years on the front lines and a diagnosis of PTSD, I realized that the only way out of the wreckage was through the story.

I am the author of A Medic’s Mind and Trauma and Tea, and the host of the podcast MatthewHeneghan: Unfiltered. This blog is my “fuck you” to the hustle—a space to breathe between the plays and find the magic in the quiet, grit-covered moments of trauma recovery, veteran advocacy, and resilience.

If you’re tired of the “paper value” of society and looking for real-life stories on hitting rock bottom and climbing back up, you’re in the right place. Explore the archives, hear the podcast, and let’s find the space to breathe together.

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